A woman had a cat which she loved so much, she named the cat ENOUGH. One day, the cat was not seen and so, the woman decided to check around for it. After an ultimate search and still not being able to find the cat, she decided to check inside the room, while in the room, she bent down to check under the bed for the cat, this made her breasts exposed such that anybody around would see it as clear as crystal. With frustration, the woman asked the house boy who had been staring at the exposed breasts, 'have you seen ENOUGH?' the house boy, confused, answered the woman, yes, madam, I've even seen more than enough
Read more ...
Sunday, September 30, 2012
Thursday, August 30, 2012
WHAT A MAN LOOKS LIKE WHEN...
A man was walking down
the street when he was
accosted by a particularly
dirty and shabby-looking
homeless man who asked
him for a couple of dollars
for dinner.
The man took out his wallet,
extracted ten dollars and
asked, "If I give you this
money, will you buy some
beer with it instead?"
"No, I had to stop drinking
years ago," the homeless
man replied.
"Will you use it to gamble
instead of buying food?" the
man asked.
"No, I don't gamble," the
homeless man said. "I need
everything I can get just to
stay alive."
"Will you spend it on greens
fees at a golf course instead
of food?" the man asked.
"Are you nuts!" replied the
homeless man. "I haven't
played golf in 20 years!"
"Will you spend the money
on a woman in the red light
district instead of food?" the
man asked.
"What disease would I get
for ten lousy bucks?!!"
exclaimed the homeless man.
"Well," said the man, "I'm
not going to give you the
money. Instead, I'm going to
take you home for a terrific
dinner cooked by my wife."
The homeless man was
astounded. "Won't your wife
be furious with you for
doing that? I know I'm dirty,
and I probably smell pretty
disgusting."
The man replied, "That's
okay. I just want her to see
what a man who
gives up beer, gambling,
golf, and sex look like"
Read more ...
the street when he was
accosted by a particularly
dirty and shabby-looking
homeless man who asked
him for a couple of dollars
for dinner.
The man took out his wallet,
extracted ten dollars and
asked, "If I give you this
money, will you buy some
beer with it instead?"
"No, I had to stop drinking
years ago," the homeless
man replied.
"Will you use it to gamble
instead of buying food?" the
man asked.
"No, I don't gamble," the
homeless man said. "I need
everything I can get just to
stay alive."
"Will you spend it on greens
fees at a golf course instead
of food?" the man asked.
"Are you nuts!" replied the
homeless man. "I haven't
played golf in 20 years!"
"Will you spend the money
on a woman in the red light
district instead of food?" the
man asked.
"What disease would I get
for ten lousy bucks?!!"
exclaimed the homeless man.
"Well," said the man, "I'm
not going to give you the
money. Instead, I'm going to
take you home for a terrific
dinner cooked by my wife."
The homeless man was
astounded. "Won't your wife
be furious with you for
doing that? I know I'm dirty,
and I probably smell pretty
disgusting."
The man replied, "That's
okay. I just want her to see
what a man who
gives up beer, gambling,
golf, and sex look like"
Saturday, August 25, 2012
COURT CASE
Two young guys appear in
court after being arrested for
smoking Marijuana.
The judge says, 'You seem like
nice young men, and I'd like
to give you a second chance
instead of jail time. I want
you to go out this weekend
and try to convince others of
the evils of drug use. I'll see
you back in court Monday.'
On Monday, the judge asks
the first guy, 'How did you do
over the weekend?'
'Well, your honor, I
persuaded 17 people to give
up drugs forever.'
'Seventeen people? That's
wonderful. How did you do
it?'
'I used a diagram, your
honor. I drew two circles like
this: O o. Then I told them
that the big circle is your
brain before drugs and the
small circle is your brain after
drugs.'
'That's admirable,' says the
judge. Then he turns to the
second guy. 'And how did you
do?'
'Well, your honor, I
persuaded 156 people to give
up drugs forever.'
'Wow!' says the judge. '156
people! How did you manage
to do that?'
'Well, I used a similar
diagram,' the guy says. 'I
drew two circles like this: o O.
Then I pointed to the little
circle and said, 'This is your
asshole before prison."
Read more ...
court after being arrested for
smoking Marijuana.
The judge says, 'You seem like
nice young men, and I'd like
to give you a second chance
instead of jail time. I want
you to go out this weekend
and try to convince others of
the evils of drug use. I'll see
you back in court Monday.'
On Monday, the judge asks
the first guy, 'How did you do
over the weekend?'
'Well, your honor, I
persuaded 17 people to give
up drugs forever.'
'Seventeen people? That's
wonderful. How did you do
it?'
'I used a diagram, your
honor. I drew two circles like
this: O o. Then I told them
that the big circle is your
brain before drugs and the
small circle is your brain after
drugs.'
'That's admirable,' says the
judge. Then he turns to the
second guy. 'And how did you
do?'
'Well, your honor, I
persuaded 156 people to give
up drugs forever.'
'Wow!' says the judge. '156
people! How did you manage
to do that?'
'Well, I used a similar
diagram,' the guy says. 'I
drew two circles like this: o O.
Then I pointed to the little
circle and said, 'This is your
asshole before prison."
Wednesday, August 22, 2012
THE MAN SHE LOVES MOST
One day a man came back
early from his office. He was
shocked to
see his wife with another
man -
jona. He told his wife to go
out of the room. Then he said
to
jona, "what are you doing
here?"jona
replied "I love your wife &
she loves me too.” To this
the
man
said "I know that my wife
loves
me & not you." After a long
conversation they decided
"we'll
hold our guns & fire at
each other
&pretend to be dead. She
will
mourn for the guy she
loves the
most & the other person
will get
out of their lives."The wife
heard
the gunshots, she came into
the
room, shocked and
surprised,
stood staring at both the
dead
bodies. Suddenly she
started
laughing out loudly,
rejoicing and
shouted "kay get out of
that
wardrobe, these 2 idiots
are dead
now!”
Read more ...
early from his office. He was
shocked to
see his wife with another
man -
jona. He told his wife to go
out of the room. Then he said
to
jona, "what are you doing
here?"jona
replied "I love your wife &
she loves me too.” To this
the
man
said "I know that my wife
loves
me & not you." After a long
conversation they decided
"we'll
hold our guns & fire at
each other
&pretend to be dead. She
will
mourn for the guy she
loves the
most & the other person
will get
out of their lives."The wife
heard
the gunshots, she came into
the
room, shocked and
surprised,
stood staring at both the
dead
bodies. Suddenly she
started
laughing out loudly,
rejoicing and
shouted "kay get out of
that
wardrobe, these 2 idiots
are dead
now!”
Sunday, August 12, 2012
FRUSTRATED PRINCIPAL
A frustrated principal said to
his students on a monday
morning at the assembly
ground; Since the Genesis of
this term, some students
have been Exodusing home
early and i will use my
Levitical power to
Deuteronomise their
Numbers. To do this, i have
appointed Joshua as one of
the Judges, Ruth and Samuel
as Kings. To chronicle the
event is Ezra. Nehemiah and
Esther will complete the Job
and they shall all sing in
Psalms and speak in Proverbs.
Read more ...
his students on a monday
morning at the assembly
ground; Since the Genesis of
this term, some students
have been Exodusing home
early and i will use my
Levitical power to
Deuteronomise their
Numbers. To do this, i have
appointed Joshua as one of
the Judges, Ruth and Samuel
as Kings. To chronicle the
event is Ezra. Nehemiah and
Esther will complete the Job
and they shall all sing in
Psalms and speak in Proverbs.
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